Buddyhead's Rules of Rock

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35 Responses

  1. Joey says:

    Dudes, most of these make total sense, but beards are fucking cool. I’m not talking zz top beards or anything like that, but a well kept thin beard can be fucking cool.

  2. richie says:

    Even Eddie Van Halen uses a cord on his guitar….

  3. Lukas Judge says:

    On principle, fuck beards. You don’t need to advertise that your bands is from Silverlake, Williamsburg NY, or Fishtown in Philly. Relapse and Hydra Head are not going to sign you. Vagrant may. Idiots.

  4. Ben Edge says:

    Bad Brains shouldn’t play reggae either.

    The guitarist of Bad Brains plays with his strap WAY high, and I’m saying he gets a pass on rule #18.

    I know you’re kidding about #25-26 (the first #26). So many great fat guys, I don’t know where to start. How about Big Boys and Minutemen.

    I agree with #29, but mainly because I’m 31 and I still can’t grow one.

    As far as #32 goes, why should Fugazi even be an exception to that rule? It’s a moot point, because they don’t play anymore, but I say they don’t even get the pass.

    Every other rule I am in “agreeance”* with.

    *The word “agreeance” is a trade marked property of Fred Durst.

  5. Maxwell says:

    Mohawks are for Mr T.

    Bondage pants are for gimps.

    Cut off denim vests are for The Outsiders.

    Putting studs on your leather jacket is the same as putting sequins on your disco pants.

  6. The ODB says:

    this post is 7 years old before beards were really cool. ha.

  7. Noely G says:

    Common misconception: Slash is a great guitar player.

    The singer of Darker My Love wears his guitar high, and he’s cooler than Slash.

  8. Steve says:

    It’s a just a joke

  9. The Jackyl says:

    “Kick out the fat guy, he’s the reason you are never gonna be big.”

    Someone tell that to Crowbar. :O

  10. The Jackyl says:

    Here’s a better litmus test for aspiring metal bands: If 15 year old girls like you, you’re not in a metal band.

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